Monthly Archives: June 2014

Why I’m Nothing Without My Wife

It’s often the things that we can’t see that have the most power.  Gravity has no color.  The wind hides from our eyes.  These invisible forces influence us in ways that we may take for granted or only give a fleeting thought.  Imagine your life without them and you get a picture of what chaos would look like.  These invisible forces hold our world together like my wife does for me.

The bond between my wife and I is invisible.  However it has had a profound effect on my life and who I have become.  It is like the acrobats in the Cirque de Soleil who use each other as ladders to climb to higher and higher heights.  All that I have achieved is because of my wife.  Each time that I smile it is in at least small part because of my wife.  I get over sad times faster because of her influence.  She gives me strength and masks my weaknesses by who she is.

As I sit here ten years removed from our vows, I think of the promises that we made to each other.  Why would I not make those promises for what I have received in return?  I got the deal of a lifetime.  I love you Beck!

The Fearometer

NormandyFear, one of our most basic emotional states, has served us through the millennia to keep us alive.  Few of us are in daily peril from the elements or predators anymore.  So our fear mechanism has little real cause for use.  So we sometimes indulge the fear mechanism in very benign circumstances.  Although emotions are not perfectly quantifiable, I would suggest that we take some time to truly assess our fears and their intensity.  Where would most of our fears of today rate on the Fearometer?

Fears are very personal.  However when I think through history and all of the possible situations that could cause a fear level of TEN, being a soldier on a boat about to storm the beach of Normandy is always at the top of the list.  Waiting for a door to open to almost certain death is something that I’m not sure that I could handle.  By comparison, my daily fears seem extremely small and petty.

So where do your fears rank?  Is talking to that special person and asking them out really a TEN?  Or is it a FIVE that you’ve turned into a TEN?  Since most of our fears are societal and not natural, inflation is something that is bound to happen.  We make things bigger and scarier in order to protect ourselves.  But from what?  A moment of discomfort?  The truth?  In the end you need to decide if your Fearometer is working well for you or is it paralyzing you?

Regret is momentary pain that you have chosen to make permanent.